i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
