would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
