that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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