Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
