Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
