Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
