It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
