If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
