U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
