Pants 0. Shit 1.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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