I met the friendliest cop last night
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
My penis needs a shock collar
I can't put those talents on a resume
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
