I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
