Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
