i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Randomize
