thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize