Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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