spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
