my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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