My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
