Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
