He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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