She said her name was "party"
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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