Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
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I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
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I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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