Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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