I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
