i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
