im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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