Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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