So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
