Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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