Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize