If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize