I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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