If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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