I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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