the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize