Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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