I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
