I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Randomize
