the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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