Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize