stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize