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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang

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• (518): View more from New York

  I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit

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• (607): View more from New York

  I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice

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• (310): View more from California

  I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.

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