Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!

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  (917): I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done! http://tfl.nu/5vwu
  Replies (18) Good night (1507) Bad night (2725)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week

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  (780): girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week http://tfl.nu/5wm5
  Replies (32) Good night (6719) Bad night (1156)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.

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  (928): She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon. http://tfl.nu/cf99
  Replies (31) Good night (8587) Bad night (3038)
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  (631): View more from New York

  she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?

  (516): View more from New York

  nope.

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  (631): she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"? (516): nope. http://tfl.nu/1bih
  Replies (21) Good night (1323) Bad night (4412)
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  (212): View more from New York

  Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.

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  (212): Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom. http://tfl.nu/fuov
  Replies (19) Good night (943) Bad night (4729)
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  (646): View more from New York

  Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.

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  (646): Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around. http://tfl.nu/mt6p
  Replies (7) Good night (600) Bad night (1326)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"

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  (718): Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards" http://tfl.nu/67i1
  Replies (5) Good night (1387) Bad night (558)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.

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  (847): This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird. http://tfl.nu/h1he
  Replies (3) Good night (844) Bad night (468)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Bouncers are people too...giant angry people

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  (507): You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night (815): Bouncers are people too...giant angry people http://tfl.nu/aryb
  Replies (3) Good night (1314) Bad night (465)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him

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  (734): Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him http://tfl.nu/qq0a
  Replies (0) Good night (433) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.

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  (914): Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever. http://tfl.nu/0i96
  Replies (1) Good night (875) Bad night (419)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.

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  (574): I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it. http://tfl.nu/8dj0
  Replies (7) Good night (1069) Bad night (260)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Wow. Last night.

  (1-518): View more from New York

  I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"

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  (518): Wow. Last night. (1-518): I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen" http://tfl.nu/7dw8
  Replies (2) Good night (523) Bad night (244)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.

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  (361): I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08. http://tfl.nu/948b
  Replies (3) Good night (679) Bad night (351)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.

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  (720): If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit. http://tfl.nu/qufi
  Replies (1) Good night (328) Bad night (185)

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