Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
