I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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