What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
then he tried to convert me to islam
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
