I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
handjob tips. give me some.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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