i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
