we made out on top of his cat.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
