Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Vodka?
Forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Is Oprah even human
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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