she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
they call him Oral-B. enough said
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize